小作文点评

10月31号的小作文据网友回忆如下：

2009年1-10月小作文各题型出镜率一览表

        由以上的图形可以看出来，柱状图几乎是月月必考，表格下半年除了8月份未考以外，其他月份几乎占到了2次每月。所以给烤鸭们一个提示：备考小作文的过程中常规图（柱状图，表格图，线状图）一定不能放松备考状态。

        此文的主体段建议大家分3段进行，主体段一描述男性比例，段二女性比例，段三总比例。遣词时注意千变万化原则：占多少比例可能用到的谓语动词有：take up , make up, contribute to, attribute to等；造句时注意：“文字描写为主，数据支持为辅，同时要注意数据与数据之间的对比”。

二．大作文点评

10月31号大作文题目如下：

        The environment problems facing today's world are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. Government and large companies should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment.

        To what extend do you agree or disagree?

        该考题用一句诗来形容是：无可奈何花落去，似曾相识燕归来。该题与07年2月3号，08年9月13号，09年2月21号的考题神似；这也契合了新东方课堂上反复强调的一点：反复诵读历年真题的必要性。一般而言，雅思写作大作文中的环境类烤鸭应该从以下三个方面着手准备：

        1. 谁该肩负起环境保护的责任，考题一般会给出个人、公司、国家、国际合作等4个选项（如04年5月15日，07年2月3日，09年2月21号的考题）。

        2. 该如何保护环境，考题通常会给出某个方案然后让考生给出自己的见解（如06年6月17日，08年6月14日考题）。

        3. 探究人类面临环境破坏时置若罔闻的原因及解决措施（如08年9月13日，09年10月31号考题）

        在内容上建议烤鸭采取折中态度，即环境保护的责任应该由政府、公司、个人三方面来共同承担，全文共分5段进行：

第一段：交代大的社会背景，环境保护所面临的困境并提出自己的写作目的,共3句话：

        S1（S代表Sentence，S1代表第一句，下同):Stepping into the new millennium, the topic of environmental protection never fails to attract people's concern (环保话题自人类步入新世纪以来一直都是人们关注的焦点).

        S2: Recently, an ongoing debate which has become the center of controversy goes like this: who is responsible for the environmental preservation: the authority, the big cooperation, or the individual citizen? (环境保护究竟有谁来负责：政府，企业还是个人？第2句属标题改写，但是一定要注意用词的多样性，忌照抄原文)

        S3: From my perspective, the three elements are inextricably intertwined and thus can be promoted simultaneously. (提出自己的观点：即三方应共同来肩负此重任.以极其简洁明了的语言提出自己的观点，切忌论点模糊不清)

第二段：分析政府应该肩负起环境保护的原因，共4句话：

        S1:It is an indisputable fact that governments play an indispensable part in protecting the environment. (第一句主题句，总起全段:政府在保护环境中承担着不可推卸的责任）

        S2：With all the revenues contributed by the taxpayers, the administrations are supposed to create a better living environment for its citizens by designing greenbelts,recreational parks, and open space.(第一个分论点： 政府应把纳税人的钱花在实处，开设更多的公共绿地绿带，生态公园以为公民提供良好的居住环境)

        S3:Also, through compulsory fines and penalties, governments can manipulate environmental protection laws and regulations to punish those individuals and organizations who are offending our common living space, which is definitely beyond the capabilities of a huge company, let alone an single citizen. (第二个分论点： 政府既然作为一种法定意义的团体，有制定和执行环境保护法的权利，而这一权利是普通企业和个人所没有的。因此，从法律的角度而言，保护环境，政府义不容辞)

        S4:Last but not least, as a major sponsor and advocator of environmental conservation, the authority is required to promote some professional knowledge needed to cope with servere environmental issues like desertification and salinity, which require a significant amount of investigation and research as well as a robust financial basis, all of these are out of a common citizen or a company's reach. (第三个分论点：某些严重的环境问题：如土壤的沙漠化，盐质化都需要很大的科研投资或者是资金投入，而这些都是一般的公民或公司无法做到的)

第三段：分析企业应该肩负起环境保护的原因，共4句话：

        S1:Meanwhile,we should never neglect the responsibility shouldered by the cooperations , especially those of business tycoon, which bears an inescapable obligation in publicizing, promoting,building environmental awareness among consumers.(第一句主题句：总起全段，企业在保护环境中承担着不可推卸的责任，尤其是在包装自己产品的过程中，企业尤其需要注重自身环保形象的塑造和环保意识的宣传。）

        S2：As a further illustration, being environmental friendly can boost a company's public image and customers who are keen on products made from an environmentally conscious business will be loyal to the cooperation and the mouth reputation is therefore being built .(第一个分论点：对于企业的长期发展有好处：顾客由于关注产品是否环保而选择会在同类产品中选择环保型企业。如此往复，企业的公众形象会得到提升，口碑也会打响。)

        S3-S4:Lastly, by clinging to environmental standards, industries are forced to enhance their production lines, make optimal use of raw materials and maximize profit margin. To be more specific, the application of eco-hospitable equipments can reduce waste,minimize pollution and decelerate the depreciation of machinery .(第二个分论点：遵守生产的各项环境和质检标准能够使企业优化自己的生产线，最大限度地使用自己的原材料和扩大自己的利润。通过使用生态友好型设备，企业能够减少自己的废弃物排放和设备的磨损。)

第四段：分析个人应该肩负起环境保护的原因，共5句话：

        S1:Some people may argue that tiny individual actions may seem to be trivial compared to the scale and intricacy of global environmental problems such as pollution, deforestation and depletion of natural resources.(第一句让步句：先提出反方论点，即个人所做的努力相对于错综复杂的全球性环境问题如污染，土壤沙漠化，以及自然资源的枯竭是非常渺小的, 为接下来的反驳做好准备。)

        S2-S3：However, they are oversimplifying the situation.As a matter of fact, trivial as individual actions may seem, they can turn out to be more powerful than we imagined once turned into united power. (第二三句：先反驳，再进一步提出自己的论点，指出你我迈出一小步，环境保护工程进步一大步这个道理)

        S4-S5: By referring to the public transportation, walking, or bicycle, We are free from the anxieties of being trapped in a traffic jam as well as cutting down the use of fossil fuels and avoiding air contamination. Plus, economizing energy like turning on the air conditioner only when necessary, or turning off the leaking faucet will ultimately exert a positive impact on our environment. (第四五句：以举例的形式进一步论证个人在生活中的一系列不经意的举动能够使我们的环境变得更加和谐。)

第五段： 总结全文，指出政府、企业、个人三者应共同努力环境才能越来越美好。共2句

        S1:To conclude, the improvement and preservation of our environment is not due to a unilateral effort, would this effort come from the government, the business or the individual citizen, rather, it is a joint endeavor by these three sides.

        S2: And I believe by coordinating, communicating and cooperating with each other, a real Utopia world can be envisioned. (总结全文，并展望未来，注意押前韵修辞格的使用coordinating, communicating and cooperating)